VforVanity

If you have ever gone through something in life that creates the all consuming stress, the type of stress that puts you physically and emotionally in a state of turmoil. You’ve probably researched how to deal with it, how to get through each day. I’t feels like it will never end. You will most likely come across advice like ‘gratitude is the attitude’ and ‘focus on the good’. However, it is nearly impossible to see the good with any depth when you’re experiencing a life beating. We will appreciate our loved ones, beautiful days and the opportunities we’ve been given but only on a surface level. Our emotions run deeper than our ability to understand and control them so it’s not as easy as seeing the good. The bottom line is, sometimes you’ve to ride the wave and let it pass. The last thing you need on top of everything else is to feel pressured to embrace life as it is in the worst moments, and feel bad about yourself because you weren’t’t able to. Who is? I have some suggestions that might help, however, give yourself a break, you may not be in the right frame of mind for any of it in the moment. That’s ok. The tough love part, it doesn’t matter what happens to you in life or who is responsible for it. It is your responsibility to ensure you come out the other end stronger and better. No one else can do that for you. Only you.

Talk

It’s often really difficult to talk about life when you’re in the midst of a storm. Despite what men think of women, most women I know find it difficult to talk about real things, but we know we have to. We can’t be everything for everyone when we barely function. Talking might be hard but it is necessary. If you feel you don’t have anyone you can talk to, there are people all over the world who would love the chance to have your back. join groups or find some on social media etc. You are never really alone. Reaching out isn’t easy but feel the fear and do it anyway.

Write

Journaling is amazing for helping you find the answers you didn’t know you had. You can just word dump, release all thoughts onto paper (or type if you prefer). Great for getting things off your chest. You can write positive affirmations, this will help with reminding you of how amazing you are and that you can make it through any storm. Law of attraction journal is great for reminding you of your goals and helping you keep your eye on the prize, you can have anything in life that you want if you keep focus on it and remove doubt. Feel the fire burn in you for your future. Gratitude journaling, writing at least 5 things that you are grateful for everyday.And my person favourite, shadow work. Ask yourself the difficult questions and see that you already have the answers. There are no rules for journaling, you can manage this anyway that works for you.

Meditation

The first thing I’d like to say about meditation is that, it’s not about switching off. Unless you’re meditating every day for hours. that won’t happen. Meditation is about learning to gain a little more control of your thoughts. If meditation frightens you a little. Try this first. Sit comfortably, stare at a blank wall and try to think about nothing. Every time a thought comes into your mind, acknowledging it and say to yourself or out loud ‘Thank you but not right now’. Push the thought to the side and start again. We allow our thoughts to take over. This is a great practice for learning to recognise thoughts when they arrive and remove the ones that don’t benefit us in that moment. Meditation is similar to this exercise. The best natural medicine you can give yourself is a daily meditation.

Cold shower/ice bath

Let’s be honest, this one brutal. However, turning the shower to the coldest setting at the end of a shower or dipping into an ice bath has so many physical health benefits but more than that. Ice baths help with managing stress, you’ll find a strength within yourself and you will begin to notice how much calmer you are, you’ll be less irritable and happier.

Exercise

This one is obvious but important. I get that it’s a thought to go for a walk in the cold or after you’ve had a long day at work. As much as you’ll dread it to begin with, you’ll eventually look forward to it. You’ll see the difference in how you feel in every way. More energised, more at peace and of course fitter.

I know that these things are harder in tough times but they are also more important in tough times. Don’t expect yourself to do all of them every day or to jump in to any of them fully right away but I promise that if you feel you are being proactive in some way, in any way. You will feel like you have a little more control and if you can do it consistently, you’ll see yourself grow. Use hard times to push yourself forward. No one and nothing can hold you back. If you fall back, push harder.